HorseMeatMichael: The Chess Adventurer
Meet HorseMeatMichael, a courageous warrior on the vast battlefield of chess, who approaches every game with a mixture of determination, humor, and a dash of unpredictability. Known more for his enthusiastic spirit than for a spotless win record, Michael has been steadily carving his unique path through the chess universe since 2021.
Rating and Playstyle
Starting with a blazing Bullet rating of 837 in 2021 — probably from one intense game that ended swiftly — Michael's journey has mostly been in Rapid chess, where he’s battled through highs and lows with a peak rating flirting with the mid-700s around 2025. His opponents never quite know what to expect, as his games average around 50 moves per win, showing a penchant for long, strategically twisting fights rather than quick checkmates.
Known for an early resignation rate of about 12%, Michael sports an impressive comeback rate of 63%. Losing a piece doesn’t rattle him one bit — in fact, he boasts a 100% win rate after losing material, proving he's the king of turning tables and making the impossible slightly less impossible.
The Record
Over hundreds of Rapid games, HorseMeatMichael holds a respectable but humble win-loss-draw tally: 127 wins, 144 losses, and 12 draws. Blitz and Bullet haven’t been as kind, with very few games played and no wins recorded there — but hey, everyone has their battlefield.
His favorite opening is a "Top Secret" weapon, used in 283 Rapid battles with a win rate of nearly 45%. This mysterious strategy keeps his rivals guessing — perhaps it’s a bold gambit, a sneaky knight maneuver, or simply a move Michael isn’t ready to reveal just yet.
Psychological Insights and Quirks
Despite a low tilt factor of 7, Michael shows a juicy 45% higher win rate when playing rated games compared to casual ones, proving that the pressure of the spotlight ignites his fighting spirit. He seems to enjoy the quiet intensity of afternoons (especially at hour 17 with an astonishing nearly 78% win rate) and has a peculiar knack for winning every game played at midnight – if only he could schedule more midnight matches!
Rivals and Friends
Michael’s opponent list reads like a variety show of chess characters. He’s had some tough luck against frequent foes like fatcockandy and wimmertpenoos100, but also boasts a 100% success rate against many lesser-known challengers. Whether facing off with “jaqmes00” or “babanksy,” Michael never shies away from a fight, always bringing his trademark tenacity.
Final Thoughts
HorseMeatMichael may not be your average grandmaster, but his chess adventures are full of surprises, battles of endurance, and the spirit of relentless improvement. Whether he’s crafting a comeback from seemingly lost positions or quietly improving his rapid rating year after year, one thing is clear: Michael plays not just to win, but to enjoy the beautifully messy chaos that is chess.
