Michael Auger: The Patzer Who Became a National Master
Michael Auger, known online as patzerplay, is a National Master whose username is a glorious lie. He is not a patzer. With over 3,200 rated games logged, a peak bullet rating of 2596 (2026-08-20), and a career that spans more than a decade, Auger has spent years proving that self-deprecating handles are for people who win anyway. His preferred time control is bullet, and his play reflects a deep love affair with the clock.
From Patzer to National Master
Auger's chess journey started modestly in 2011, when his bullet rating was a very human 1046. By 2013 he was already crossing the 2300s in bullet, and in 2026 he touched a blistering peak bullet rating of 2596 (2026-08-20). The title of National Master is not just a credential, it is a warning label. His username, patzerplay, is the kind of reverse psychology that only works when you have the rating to back it up. His longest winning streak of 22 games suggests that when the pieces are moving fast, Auger is moving faster.
The Bullet Addict
If there is one format that defines Michael Auger, it is bullet. He has played more than 2,400 bullet games, winning 1,226, losing 1,111, and drawing 138. The rating graph tells the story of a player who keeps coming back for more, even when the clock is screaming.
shows a long, rocky climb to the 2500s, complete with dramatic swings that would break lesser players. His best time of day is 09:00, which is a polite way of saying he plays better before the rest of the world wakes up. Monday is his strongest day at 58.94 percent, while Thursday is apparently a coin flip he keeps losing.Opening Repertoire
As white, Auger is a creature of habit. The Sicilian Defense is his bread and butter, and within that, the Alapin Variation appears in over 150 of his bullet games as white, with a solid 59 percent score. He also enjoys the Caro-Kann Defense and has a soft spot for the Barnes Defense, which he punishes with a 64 percent win rate as white. As black, he is comfortable facing the Amar Gambit, where he has navigated 87 bullet games with a roughly even score. A typical Alapin might look like this:
. For a visual breakdown of his results by opening, see .Rivalries and Rivals
No biography would be complete without the rivals who helped shape Auger's play. His most frequent opponent is Evan Ju, a player who has faced Auger 122 times across bullet and blitz. The series is tight: 46 wins for Auger, 61 for eilyisum, and 15 draws. Another familiar name is Aakaash Meduri, who has played Auger 111 times, with Auger holding the edge 58 to 44. And then there is SomePatzer, the opponent whose username is more accurate than Auger's own, and who has beaten Auger 70 times out of 97 meetings. Even masters have kryptonite.
Personality and Habits
Auger's playing style is resilient. He comes back from losing positions 85.8 percent of the time, and even after dropping a piece he still wins nearly 48 percent of those games. His average decisive game lasts around 80 moves, which in bullet is an eternity. He rarely resigns early, with a low early resignation rate of 0.69 percent. His tilt factor is 13, which is not great, but at least he tilts early in the day. Monday is his strongest day at 58.94 percent, while Thursday is a coin flip he somehow keeps losing. All of this adds up to a player who is equal parts fearless, stubborn, and deeply entertaining to watch.